The Contemplative State

1 The LORD is my light and my salvation—

whom shall I fear?

The LORD is the stronghold of my life—

of whom shall I be afraid?
2 When evil men advance against me

to devour my flesh,

when my enemies and my foes attack me,

they will stumble and fall.
3 Though an army besiege me,

my heart will not fear;

though war break out against me,

even then will I be confident.
4 One thing I ask of the LORD,

this is what I seek:

that I may dwell in the house of the LORD

all the days of my life,

to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD

and to seek him in his temple.
5 For in the day of trouble

he will keep me safe in his dwelling;

he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle

and set me high upon a rock.
6 Then my head will be exalted

above the enemies who surround me;

at his tabernacle will I sacrifice with shouts of joy;

I will sing and make music to the LORD.
7 Hear my voice when I call, O LORD;

be merciful to me and answer me.
8 My heart says of you, "Seek his face!"

Your face, LORD, I will seek.
9 Do not hide your face from me,

do not turn your servant away in anger;

you have been my helper.

Do not reject me or forsake me,

O God my Savior.
10 Though my father and mother forsake me,

the LORD will receive me.
11 Teach me your way, O LORD;

lead me in a straight path

because of my oppressors.
12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,

for false witnesses rise up against me,

breathing out violence.
13 I am still confident of this:

I will see the goodness of the LORD

in the land of the living.
14 Wait for the LORD;

be strong and take heart

and wait for the LORD.

Psalms 27

Last night as I was spending some quiet time with God I came upon this Psalm. As I was reading it my heart became calm.

My life has been full of chaos it seems. Too many choices and not enough communication.

But through everything

God is always with me.

Unfailing Love

You have my heart

And I am yours forever

You are my strength

God of grace and power

And everything

You hold in Your hand

Still You make time for me

I can't understand

Praise You, God of earth and sky

How beautiful is Your unfailing love

Unfailing love

And You never change,

God, You remain

The Holy One and my unfailing love

Unfailing love

You are my rock

The One I hold on to

You are my song

And I sing for You

These Lyrics are Beautiful.

These words make my heart happy.

Everything I do I give my heart and soul.

Everything I do I give my heart and soul.



Plain and simple.



God is cool.

Do you Trust?

Have you ever really thought of that?

It is so hard to trust God because you loose control.

But...

Whatever we put in God's hands we can be assured it is safe

(~Nneka said this~)

Trust in God.

Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.

Psalm 9:10

If you fully trust in God and you seek him out will he not grant you the desires of your heart? If your desires are for God's Glory and His Power will he not provide it?

God is so amazing.

This week has been Good.

Through fasting I am learning that I am content.

I am content in where I am at with God.

God has shown me that he is pleased with me and loves me for me.

I am set apart.

For His works.

For His people.

I have been chosen by God.

What calling is better than that?

I trust.

Strengthen Yourself to Lead

Hebrews 12:12-13

Therefore strengthen the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be dislocated, but rather be healed.

I was looking through my bible last night and I found this highlighted and next to it I wrote Strengthen Yourself to Lead. When I saw this my heart just started racing. I realized I am straighting my paths before God and I am preparing myself to Lead. These past couple of days have been amazing. God has given my taste of things that I can't even explain.

Yesterday my church began a 7 day fast. I have committed to that because I feel it is important to support my pastors and leaders. Not only will I grow with God but I will be growing with my church family.
Another reason is I fully trust and believe my Pastors and Leaders. Every time I have ever doubted them I have asked and when they explain to me and I understand.

God has really poured out his blessing on these people. There is no one better I would want to follow when it comes to God's plan.

Unity has always been a big thing on my heart.
This week that is going to be a Key Factor!

We must be one in the spirit. We must be one in the Lord.

Just thinking...

"In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me?"- Psalm 56:4

My first thought when I saw this verse was ick yeah right. We are horrible (as in all living beings). Then I thought of sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me... and once again i said to myself ick yeah right... words are always hurtful.
But Gods words are so calming. So relaxing. One word whispered in our ears by God is worth more than a million compliments coming from friends and family...

But why does this verse say what can mortal man do to me?

The truth is God allows things to happen...

Why?

Becuase its part of this huge scheme that we will never understand or even begin to comprehend!

But if we just have faith in God and truly trust him and serve him through are trials.... how amazing will that day be when God turns to you and says... Well done good and Faithful servent...


Why fear? Does God not say in Mathew "who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life.".... Fear I believe is from the devil.... without fear we would totally trust God... and that is exactly what the devil does not want us to do....

So when it comes down to it... by removing fear we remove satan. By trusting God we allow change.

Not just any change...

A Good Change.

"In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me?"

Im a Going All the Way...

So yesturday I was able to go to the usual meetings for the Way Fellowship Church Plant.

I haven't been in a long time... too long... but since there was a power outage at work I got the day off... Yay!

The meeting was crazy.

As John Bryant was talking I found myself looking at him differently.

Not a bad different... just... different.

I am really taking a step into my future.

As he talked about Abraham, Issac, and Jacob and plenty of other things.. such as how we will be blessed... and all that fun stuff... I looked at him with deep thought.

I found myself talking to God in my head the whole time.


Do we match up spiritually?
Am I really going to give up my full time job and work part time to dedicate the rest of my time to Gods ministry under this man?
Is he a good leader?

and many more questions....

I was kinda in a daze when I left the meeting.

I prayed about it all day yesturday while accompishing a lot of stuff for this Saturday....

The more I prayed about it the more I felt comfortable...

The answers were all yes...

I know I want to follow God and know God has told me to go with The Way... but now it comes down to really placing everything in Gods hand...

Placing everything in Gods hands is one thing...
but at the same time I know that God also wants to me to trust John. And I do completly... but it was hard enough giving control to God...

Arghhh...


Just my thoughts....

I am so excited at where I am in my life...

So remind me of that when I get upset... Haha...

Whoa.

Long time no Blog.

I got a TB test today.

In case you didn't know...

Needles and I don't mix.

I only cried once... and that was before I even saw the needle.

Then I felt bad because there was a little boy who had an IV next to me and his mom was telling me how he didn't even flinch.

I am a sissy.

Oh well.

God is so good to me.

I had a crisis.

A "Im 20 and still living at home" crisis.

So I went out and got a job.

...Full Time...

My goal:
Be out of the house by September!

Yay!

I start this week.

I am way excited...

Plus
I still have the internship.

Whoa... This just in....

I am watching the news.

President Bush is giving a speech about a shooting happening right now as I type this.

Twenty-nine are dead...

Lord I pray for the famlies of the students from Virgina Tech who are now gone. Lord hold their families in your arms and show them your love.
Amen.

Demetri Martin Standup Comedy

Ha... Wait till the End...

Heart Rate is Rapidly Increasing

Massive Heart Attack!

No not Really.

As we continue to meet every Thursday morning for our Way meetings, God is continually showing me the wisdom he has given to the other team members.

Not only wisdom, but heart.

These team members are amazing.

God has placed us together knowing that our personalities are different, our walks with Him are different, our family life and all of our struggles are different... but yet... none the less... We all fall into perfect little niches and fit right together.

Like a puzzle.

I love it.

Yesterday as I was sitting there listening to all of them talk... I really felt as if I had a whole new group of friends.

They were all ready family... but to me family means always having to care for them... but with friends you choose whether or not you want to care for them.

And I have chosen.

As Christians we are called to love all people.
(I constantly fail at that.)

I Keep On Pressing.

Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
~All American Reject Lyrics

So this is what comes to mind.

If God could say something to me right now... it would be those lyrics.

I love being an intern... but sometimes... you get a kick in the butt.

I feel as if there is so much I want to share with the students, but there is a HUGE WALL!

These past couple of months have been the hardest of all.

I personally... am disapointed in myself. I feel as if I am missing the mark. I can feel God telling me that "Its okay. Just keep going. Your heart is in this for the students not for you."


It is times like this where I want to step back and say "I Quit."

But... I can't. I am way stronger than this... I just have to press through.

Please keep me in your prayers.

I'll keep on pressing.

I Have a Secret

I have a secret.

Its a secret that only God knows.

Tonight we did a night of Praise and Worship.

Plus we met two missionary women from Thailand. They are Extraordinary.

There is a need for a Worship Leader in Bancock. (If thats how you spell it.)

Can you imagine that?

Someone, some where in the world is being called to fulfill this need whether they know it or not. God is planting seeds and placing people in their path all within His perfect timing.

I am praying about going to Thailand this summer. It has to be a God thing.

Not a me thing.

So Please pray.

And

Yes I do have a secret that I will share one day, but not yet.

Gods Constant Reminder

Sometimes I get so set in my routine.

Last night when talking to my worship leader about who needed to worship for our Celebrating Recovery class I was the lucky one chosen.

This sounds selfish.... so remember I am human and I constantly fail.

First of all...
I didn't want to give up part of my Friday night.
I wanted to just hang out and relax.

So I go down to the church and I am setting everything up. I felt as if everything was going wrong. I could tell that God was wanting me to break my routine.

So I grab a stool and I go and sit on the same level as the small group to worship. (Like instead of standing on the stage)

As I feel like I am about to ruin everything God presses on my heart to tell them its okay to sing to him within a small group. Don't be concerened about the people next to you.

So we proceed to do a couple of worship songs and I am just messing up left and right with my fingers.

For some reason my fingers and my guitar are in a dispute.

I am just thinking to myself why are so disoriented tonight?

Then it hits me.

God is still waiting for me to meet him.

I lower my voice and listen to the other eight people singing. It was beautiful. They were in his presence and I was not.

I stop playing the guitar.

I lift my hands and I sing out to God.

Then I relize its not that my fingers arent meeting my guitar.

Im not meeting God.

I never cease to be in awe at what God has to tell me.

Seeker vs Believer

Love God
Love People
Love the World

Easy Right?

So our meeting on Thursday morning for The Way was good. We talked a lot about being Gods masterpiece.

Ephesians 2:10
(NIV)
10For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

(NASB)
10For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.

(NLT)
10 For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.

Isn't that way cool? We were crafted in such a way that is unexplainable that we are called his masterpiece!
So not only are we a beautiful masterpiece, but we have good things prepared by God for us to walk in.

TIGHT!

Okay.

Believer vs Seekers

When begining a church plant which direction do you want to go?

Trick Question.

Niether.

As I told John Bryant "How can you possibly choose? Whatever one you pick you are leaving out the other."

What do I mean by this?

Okay... Its pretty simple.

Believer Focus: We dig into the Bible with Great Depth and learn more of Gods word. Hopefully you will have some knowledge of who Christ is before you come. Because we want to grow and not wait for you to catch up.

Seeker Focus: We have an alter call every week and God is saving people left and right! Everywhere you look a new believer is popping up. Now what? What do you we do with them? Ahh... Who knows... but lets keep saving them!

Now I know I sound a little sarcastic and a bit over exagerated, but I was trying to do that so you understand what I mean.

If we aren't Believer centered and we aren't Seeker centered...

Then what are we?

...Drum Roll Please...

Jesus Centered.

Too easy right?

Jesus appealed to both the Believer and the Seeker.

Did he not?

We Focus on Jesus and who he was and what he did and how.

Our ultimate Focus is God.


The Way Vision

What is our vision you might ask?
Ahh... Who knows. We can try to make what up, but whats the point?

Gods Vision for they way?
Wow I am glad you asked!

Love God
Love People
Love the World

The Way Fellowship

Well this is where you all can read my thoughts.
Good and Bad.
Peace Out!
God is Cool.